One of my favorite quotes comes from when I was a sophomore in high school: “Omnia mutantur, nihil interit.” It means, “Everything changes, nothing is lost,” from the comic book Sandman by Neil Gaiman (the EXACT definition per Sandman is a little embellished). Though I was young at the time, I’d like to think something like that attracted a core part of my personality, yet went on to influence my future philosophy. It meant accepting that nothing remains the same in life, even when it was a struggle to accept things. The most potent example is no longer being loved by someone, or no longer feeling the same love for someone else. That was definitely a struggle early in life, and a story for another time. In short, I found mental and emotional peace when I realized that everything changes and what you don’t lose is the impact it made in your life, shaping you into who you are and continuing personal growth… it is fleeting to try and force the past into the present. Time keeps marching forward.
The purpose of this post is because I occasionally struggle with the memory of friendships that were once paramount but have since faded away. How could I have done things differently? Could I have done things differently? It almost feels like a situation of keeping your cake and eating it, too. I don’t regret at all my closest friends today and my husband – and WHY they are the solid constants in my life. However, I do miss the opportunity to duplicate/relive the moments that will always remain great memories. Ultimately, there are many other factors that are beyond my control or that I’m not even aware of that cause people to follow a different path themselves. Now that I think more about it, Chris actually helped plant that thought when I told him the other day how much friendships are like The Sims. In a simplistic way, sure, but life is happening for our friends in different ways that pull them a separate direction, too. Thus, it is a waste of energy to struggle with or bring myself down thinking about it.
I like to type these thoughts out because it helps me work through what I am thinking. I can reread the thoughts, fine-tune what I said… basically proofread to the point of sorting the thoughts out.
So, I think I’m done here :)